i’m dropping out,

i’m serious. i am going to become a full timer at my job because like WHAT THE HELL IS AN EDUCATION!! its okay.. HOLIDAYS!! already! it feels like we just started the term. actually no the year like what the heck! time is going by so fast!! i only have so much left 😓 its like the world is forcing me to fast forward to when i have to spend the $5000 😠 ON THE FREAKING JAPAN TRIP LIKE WHAT THE HECK?? WHY IS IT $5000?? STRUGGLING. speaking of.. (PERFECT SEGUE)

thing #1: winter

im not doing so hot guys! IT MIGHT BE BECAUSE ITS LITERALLY 10 DEGREES EVERYDAY LIKE SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP YOU WINTER STANS IF YOU LOVE BEING FROZEN SO MUCH GO DROWN IN AN ICE PUDDLE AND GET OFF ON THAT YOU DONT HAVE TO DRAG ME INTO IT?!?!? WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS??!?!?! i am not feeling right ITS KICKING IN ALREADY AND ITS LITERALLY ONLY BEEN 17 23 days OK WAIT WELL IT WAS KICKING IN LITERALLY FIRST DAY OF JUNE I HATE YOU WINTER. YOU KNOW WHAT IVE DONE THIS WINTER? IM ACTUALLY DISTRAUGHT. I STRESSED OVER MY EDUCATION? I HAVENT DONE THAT SINCE LIKE?? 2020 ????? AND ITS ALL WINTERS FAULT. I WOULD NEVER DO THAT 😭 i genuinely cant. YK MY BEST PERFORMANCE IN WINTER WAS LIKE LAST YEAR? but i dont remember half of it so MY BEST PERFORMANCE WAS 2022 OKAY. GENSHIN WAS GEN CARRYING ME THROUGH but then like y’owch WINTER. WINTER PLEASE GET AWAY FROM ME. GO GET ANNIE (redacted) INSTEAD.

thing #2: helluva boss’s latest second latest..

guys UGH THIS (full moon) WAS LIKE THE BEST EPISODE LIKE EVER???? omg i actually need them to like get together immediately. LIKE THE OPENING SONG WAS CRAZY GOOD and the fight scene! AND GOD THE ENDING SCENE I LIKE CRIED well i usually cry BUT LIKE I ACTUALLY LIKE UGH UGH UGH GOD I AM WISHING THEM THE BEST! okay i started writing this before the newest episode came out.. it was ok! i think the voice mixing was kind of bad in just like normal dialogue so that was a bit offputting. AND VEROSIKA DIDNT SOUND RIGHT LIKE WHAT THE GECK? and the song.. the accent is like, hm.. i think it will grow on me! but it hasnt. not yet! anyway back to full moon!

[STOLAS]

Thank you to the butterflies in my stomach | PERFECT START LIKE yay butterflies!

I haven't felt this nervous | YOU GO KING

Since I was a little fluffy down nestling | he is an owl ! context !

My derring-do is half-disguised behind a smile | i have no idea what he’s saying!

My beak is grinding, ever minding | x2

I swore I wouldn't dwell on the divorce 

So for my own health, I'll remind myself 

That when I see him 

I know that it won't feel so tough

I'll believe him

And not the voice that says I'm not enough

No need for an arrangement, it can just be him and me

I'll set us free

How perfect it could be

When I see him tonight

[BLITZO]

See him tonight? Alright, alright | RAHH RAHHH 

It's been a while since he's begged for attention | me <3

Are we okay?

Huh, can't really say

I'm getting by by avoiding his questions

So complicated, I hate when it's complicated | YAY RAP SEGMENT

Why do I always end up in situations that are complicated? | yes

Here I go again, gettin' in my head

So I'll focus on the sexy stuff instead | THE DELIVERY

[STOLAS]

When I see him 

[BLITZO, spoken]

When I see him, I'm gonna do that thing he likes | do it

[STOLAS]

I will change things

[BLITZO, spoken]

No need to change things | I LOVE THEM.

I'll just bring the rope and spikes | COPE

[STOLAS, spoken]

Oh gods!

[BLITZO, spoken]

We've got a nice arrangement and it's working out just fine | DENiAL!

We'll keep it light 

[STOLAS, spoken]

I'll fucking die alone if this goes bad | SAME! 

[STOLAS & BLITZO]

When I see him tonight

[STOLAS]

Am I doing something I can't take back? | TRUE

[BLITZO, spoken]

Relax!

[STOLAS]

Would he want me if he was free?

[BLITZO, spoken]

We're fine! | i believe you

[STOLAS]

And if he's only here as a prisoner

What kind of monster does that make me? | y’owch

My entire life's been written in stone

[BLITZO, spoken]

We're gonna bone! | brooklyn 99 reference!

[STOLAS]

He taught me that I could choose

[BLITZO, spoken]

It's cool!

[STOLAS]

He deserves the choice to stay or go

Though it scares me to think what I'd lose | D:

[BLITZO]

Can't wait to lose ourselves in nasty sex 

And make that bird squawk | FR

[STOLAS]

We really must converse

[BLITZO]

We'll just stick with what makes sense

Like him (omitted for PG newsletter) my—

[STOLAS]

Augh! This is the worst!

Waiting for the shoe to drop

[BLITZO]

Who needs words when you got a mouth full of—

[STOLAS]

(omitted for PG newsletter) to your senses

[BLITZO]

Then I'll do that thing with my (omitted for PG newsletter) where I—

[STOLAS]

He's worthy of your love and trust

[BLITZO]

I'll eat his bird (omitted for PG newsletter) nice and rough

[STOLAS]

Tonight cannot come soon

[BLITZO]

He'll be (omitted for PG newsletter) soon

[BLITZO & STOLAS]

Enough

[BLITZO, spoken]

Oh yeah!

[STOLAS]

But when I see him

Will it be tender or be tough?

Will it please him or will I just be fucking it all up? | THE DEEP VOICE

Can this be a relationship or am I still naïve?

I'll set us free

Whatever it may be

When I see him tonight

much love!!

thing #3: ai art is driving me crazy.

okay i gen cannot keep going on like this. every time i am on pinterest i attempt to save something and then im like wait. this is ai art. BUT I CANT EVEN TELL IF IT IS OR NOT BECAUSE I AM OBVIOUSLY NOT A PROFESSIONAL ANTI-AI ART CONNOSIEIUR??? IM ACTUALLY SICK OF DOING THIS OK BC LIKE I JUST WANT TO ENJOY PINTEREST BUT NO ALL THIS AI STUFF IS POPPING UP ON MY FEED AND I DONT WANT TO SUPPORT IT BUT I CANT LIKE CROSS-EXAMINE EVERY PIECE OF ART ON MY FEED OK! i think i am actually going to crack soon. I AM USING PINTEREST LESS AND LESS BECAUSE OF THIS??? I WANT TO KEEP USING PINTEREST. I CANT DO THIS Y’ALLERS!

LIKE LOOK. is it real? IS IT REAL?? CAN I BE FREE TO SAVE ITS PURPLE MAJESTY?

thing #4: 9 - 5

omg WORK EXPERIENCE WAS SO FUN!! i actually like THE BABY ACTIVITY WAS SO FUN LIKE IMAGINE HAVNIG 30 BABIES IN A ROOM AND LIKE SINGING (babbling) AND DANCING (slightly swaying to the beat) IT WAS SO CUTE!!! and also like both the preschool and toddler storytime!! my heart!! and code club OMG I FELT LIKE SUCH A GENIUS THAT WAS SO COOL omg and just shelving the books was so like therapeutic OMG ALSO LIKE READING TO GRADE SCHOOL KIDS WAS LIKE YIPEE!!! and listening to them read too!! its so throwback!! i HAVE to go again! omg and like this activity where like we chat to people THAT WAS FUN TOO!! OMG AND DESTROYING PEOPLE IN SPIT!! IM SO GOOD AT SPIT!! and like learning about how like the library does stuff too IT WAS SO INVIGORATING!! LIKE ALL THE PEOPLE WORKING THERE WERE SO NICE TOO!! theyre so considerate of each other and others LIKE AAAAA!!! omg i feel like i learnt so much!! and like wow people still read newspapers!! (meta joke) THERES JUST TOO MUCH TO RECALL!!! it was one of my better weeks in life! 10/10 would recommend!! GETTING TO LIKE WALK HOME DURING MY LUNCH BREAK WAS GREAT TOO!! AND LIKE WAKING UP SUPER LATE!! FOR A 9-5 LIKE!!! our school could never. WE SHOULD BEG THEM TO MAKE THE STARTING TIME LATER. IM SERIOUS.

thing #5: spending habits

(disclaimer: not proud of this! oh happy pride by the way!!) kind of already regretting the humble bundle purchase.. BUT THAT’S LIFE! yet another itch.io bundle too 😭 I AM A VICTIM TO BUNDLES OK and microtransactions! 

also like..

oKAY BUT TO BE FAIR! I BARELY SPENT ON ANYTHING ELSE THIS MONTH!! like just karaoke and some canteen food. maybe that is the standard BUT WHEN HAVE I EVER BEEN STANDARD?? I DONT HAVE COMMON SENSE BECAUSE THAT IS FOR COMMONERS!! omg wait i bought shin ramen too. i bought 2 5 packs and then the next day they went on sale! AND THEN THE DAY AFTER THAT MY MUM BOUGHT LIKE A 20 PACK 😭 i have the redoodles for days! 

thing #6: i did a thing

i have like this list of all the fictional crushes i (remember) having and like i realised.. they all overlap.. like crosscountry.

OK LIKE SHOUT OUT TO SHU BY THE WAY, BEYBLADE BURST FTW ☠️ i would put the power rangers on too but i forgot their names and personalities! OK WAIT LITERALLY NONE OF THEM ARE OUTSIDE OF THESE CIRCLES THOUGH (given they are like.. very broad) i guess if i were to like make a circle outside of these it’d probably be funny? but like how can u be funny and not either really confident or a loser?? but not insane though. insane couldnt have its own circle. like i can imagine myself liking a character purely for their like hehe hahas but like i dont think i like anyone purely for their level of insanity 😭 maybe like JD. or shiloh. STOP OK MAYBE NOW IM LOOKING AT IT AGAIN THE CIRCLES ARE LIKE SUPER BROAD BUT LIKE MUSICIANS ARE MUSIC NERDS OK AND LIKE CONFIDENT PEOPLE OFTEN SUCK AND PEOPLE WHO SUCK ARE OFTEN LOSERS! ITS A SOUND LINE OF ARGUMENT (ENGLISH REFERENCE) RIGHT?? RIGHT?? i would probably put the caring in brackets bc i like dont mean or YK BEFORE IT SAID acts of service intensifies BUT THEN I WAS LIKE no.. that is too throwback.. speaking of throwback i would like to address the fact that draco malfoy is there and honestly i dont want to talk about it if u do timetravel to however many years ago. if you mention this to present me i will put u on mute OK ANYWAY INSANITY IS JUST LIKE A GARNISH ITS NOT LIKE AN INGREDIENT YOU KNOW?? BUT HUMOUR IS LIKE DEFINITELY AN INGREDIENT! also even the characters that are in the complete overlap part may not outshine ones that aren’t NUMBER ONE EXAMPLE IS OLIVER YANG! HE IS NOT CONFIDENT! NOR AN ASSHOLE! NOR A LOSER! BUT HE IS 👏 im missing like a bunch of charywharys from the circles but halfway through i switched up <3 

thing #7: mlp game

OK GUSY LIKE CONGRATULATE ME MY TWILIGHT SPARKLE GOT WINGS!! THAT TOOK LIKE.. TIME!! im serious the mlp game is everything you could want in a game. NO LIKE WHY DID IT LITERALLY ONLY TAKE ME A WEEK TO GET UP TO WHERE I AS A YOUTH GOT UP TO 😭 i cant believe i was not NUMBER ONE VICTORY ROYALE when i was like whatever age 😠 WHERE WAS MY STRAT ?? MY MIN MAXING?? okay anyway LIKE ITS SO NICE IN CLASS TOO BC LIKE IT WILL MAKE MONEY AS TIME PASSES! AND ALL THE QUESTS TOO!! AND you should play. YOU SHOULD PLAY SO I CAN GET MORE GEMS. michelle (the one with a soul-e) has it. THE RHYTHM GAME IS SO FUN TOO!! and the cart game. and no you do not breed the ponies jennifer 😰 i feel like im like completing all my childhood ambitions by DEMOLISHING AT THIS GAME (and spending.. some amounts of money on it..) maybe i shouldve put this topic above the spending one 💀

THE DIALOGUE IS LIKE SO WITTY TOO!! EVEN WHEN THEY’RE TRYING TO GET YOU TO SPEND COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF MONEY!! ive only spent 31 hours on it since umm sometime in may?? THATS PRETTY GOOD!! I AM HEALTHY!!! I AM A HEALTHY INDIVIDUAL!!

thing #8: my connect doodle

guys.. ITS SO CUTE. im incredibly glad i thought to take a picture! LOOK IT EVEN HAS 10E!! on to more important topics.. IT HAS NICOLE DO YOU SEE?? AND IT LOOKS SO LIKE GOBSMACKED TOO!! anyway i just wanted to flex my artistic ability. it’s name? NICOLE. THAT’S THE NAME. BECAUSE WHY WOULD I GIVE IT ANYTHING OTHER THAN THE BEST NAME? yes its an it, much love! THIS WAS ON THE FIRST TAKE TOO LIKE I JUST WROTE DOWN NICOLE AND I SAW THE VISION. too bad we’re not having it in the yearbook.. ive never felt so betrayed. /j

thing #9: mouth

OMG OK LIKE THIS STUPID ULCER HAS BEEN KILLING ME FOR LIKE?? DAYS?? i swear i feel like i have spoken about other ulcers on here BUT LIKE UGH i should be grateful i could actually talk today BUT LIKE THE PAST 3 DAYS I COULD LIKE NOT TALK! IT HURT! AND EATING WAS VERY PAINFUL! so i like have to catch up tomorrow!! hello guzman <3 idk if they will even let us go BUT THEY BETTER the city exists for the sake of me getting guzman chips and nothing else. i might just go to a different branch than my usual?? branch. is branch the word? i cant think! im too busy imagining chips <3 i actually say like a lot ok now i need to see how much i do.

okay thats not that bad!! 😄 it’s nearly ten times the amount ive said gang SO IF YOU EVER COMPLAIN ABOUT MY USAGE OF GANG SHUT UP it is ratio’d in comparison to like so that means i am experiencing a common phenomena!

thing #10: sleep

guys ok wait like i slept like 5 hours today but when i woke up like normally when i slepe like 6 hours or whatever im like i can kind of feel it but i didnt feel it all today. i think like my hunger debt like outratio’d my sleep debt or something actually i dont think i felt hungry i think they like cancelled each other out. SEE THIS IS LIKE THE POVERTY TRAP BUT LIKE um NOT SELF CARING TRAP YOUR BODY WANTS TO PRETEND ITS OK BUT ITS NOT! omg and i havent been using pokemon sleep recently.. THE SLEEP TALKING LIKE SHOCKED ME OKAY i am grateful for its discoveries but like its a habit and me and habits are like 👎 I AM NOT PIGEONHOLING MYSELF I AM JUST SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE WHICH I HAVE MUCH OF AS SOMEONE WITH A LEVEL 100 AURA!!!!! did i say that right? anyway! i will get more sleep tonight <3 i love sleep <3 i just also love to edge it

okay i would like to do a prequel so much love is literally becoming like a big part of my vocab. IT SOUNDS SO WHOLESOME!! and its like WOW MUCH?? wait NO ITS LIKE DAISUKI did i think of it from daisuki i cant remember does anyone know? it sounds like something i would do but you know what else sounds like something i would do? drugs. (/j) dont do drugs kids! 

much love,

nicole (awake?)